All month in December leading up until Christmas I routinely would ask the kids what three things were on their ‘list’. I knew what was going to be the top item on Charlie’s list, and every time he never disappointed, “A BIG BUZZ!”
He had been given (by us) a 4 inch Buzz toy from a yard sale in Wisconsin two years ago that he played with more than anything else, but since this past summer he had been nagging us and starry eyed begging us for ‘a big Buzz’.
I wasn’t surprised when he stayed the course, and no other distractions or lures could change his mind about it. He was determined, certain that the best thing in the world that he could have was the Big Buzz. I tried to coax him to look at trains or what about pirate stuff or even… nope. He needed it. He was convicted this would make his little 3 year old life so much more awesome: Big Buzz.
Why though, I kept trying to talk him out of it? I just kept feeling certain that he wouldn’t play with it. You know when that mom-tution kicks in…you just…I don’t know. You just KNOW your kid.
Despite his desperate pleas, I knew deep down he wouldn’t really want it. And he didn’t really need it. I knew what he did need: a new bedspread. A nice, fluffy downy blanket for his bed this winter. Big Buzz wasn’t going to be as fulfilling as that down comforter would be.
Yet, I also knew if he didn’t see Buzz in that pile on Christmas morning he would be so disappointed and continue to ask for his birthday, and the following Christmas and his next birthday and etc. Not really but you get the point.
I knew that until he held it in his hands, he wasn’t going to give up. He’d thought about it too long, asked for it so much, he had convinced himself this was the answer.
There wasn’t any harm in getting it for him, except maybe a waste of $40. (yes folks. Big Buzz costs $40.) But, we knew one thing was for sure, he’d be delighted on Christmas morning. And the thought of his happiness sealed the case.
Christmas morning came and what a reaction we got!
We’ve never seen a kid so tickled, so joyous and happy! What a feeling to know that we gave him that gift and he enjoyed so very much. His thank you to us was his sheer delight in that toy. For almost the whole day. And he hasn’t played with it since.
This is why I’m writing. This story was an incredibly eye opening moment for me. This is not about Christmas! Though you may choose to analyze our horrible secularized Christmas traditions however you like… sadly you’d be missing the point of this tale.
The point is, through all of this, God revealed a beautiful, smack in the face,’oh I get it’ image to me of His Fatherly love for each one of us!
You see, we all have ‘Big Buzz’ in our lives! We have that one thing we keep praying for, that one prayer request we just are determined is the answer. Nothing will change our minds and we stay the course.
And God, in all His Fatherly wisdom knows, you really need that down comforter. In the long run, you’ll appreciate that more especially when it gets cold out. But at the same time, He, as a Father, wants to delight his children! To give them the desires of their hearts! Even, sometimes, when it’s of no real benefit to them. We should allow Him to bless us with small delights, what joy it brings a parent to see their children happy. And the best way we can thank him is not to feel guilty, or hesitant but to rejoice in that tiny gift with sheer delight!
I like to reflect on this, especially when I can convince myself I should only be praying for the necessary and important things. Sometimes I feel guilty for praying for ‘frivolous’ things like my skin to clear up, or the kids to sleep in, or to win a raffle.
But Big Buzz reminds me it’s not silly. I wasn’t bothered by Charlie’s asking, and it brought me great happiness to give him the desire of his little 3 year old heart.
Sometimes, God the Father gives just for that moment of happiness. For that half a day of sheer joy.
Just because He’s a Father, too.