How to Pick ’em

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I’ve been trying to instill in the kids more of a servant mentality. And by that I mean the other afternoon I said

“Hey guys, you know what is the best thing you can say to anybody? It’s ‘what can I do to help you?‘ “

I talked to them about how everyone loves to be asked that question, and how it’s really what Jesus is calling us to do as Christians… help each other.

We went back and forth asking one another “what can I do to help you?” and it seemed to be that the lesson was learned.

Fast forward to that evening, and I was crawling around the living room floor gathering up legos, strewn story books, random sippy cups and laundry in a frantic clean-up-before-bedtime scramble.

As I stuffed puzzle pieces into their places, and re fluffed pillows for the couch, Chubs sauntered into the living room and lingered by the fireplace.

“Mom?” he asked with one hand near the bottom of his chin, “What can I do” his pointer finger began to slide up his nostril “to help you?”

My heart went from elation to shock as I watched him snag a booger and wipe it affectionately on my mantle just as he completed his offer of help.

He stared at me with his big, brown, doe eyes, truly offering his assistance out of the bottom of his heart.

I stared at him with my mouth hanging open in utter dismay as to how the whole scenario could have been more ironic.

This is also the same child who weeks earlier, as I was chatting with some friends, walked up to me in mid-conversation  and pried open my fingers, placed his booger in my hand and walked away. Completely and genuinely oblivious to how unappreciated his random acts of kindness are.

So needless to say, I informed my son he could help me by starting with that booger, and cleaning it off the mantle. to which he replied

“Ew, Mom. That’s gwoss

::sigh::

God sure knows how to keep me humble. Just when I think we’re turning a corner here I get to delightfully encounter a moment with my child that smacks me in the face with reality.

Apparently helping hands that have boogers on them are not as commonly appreciated as you would think. Next up on our agenda is learning about hygiene!

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Snot a good morning

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So this morning, as I was scrubbing down the highchair (for the first time in days….yet again another sign of the second time around) I noticed Pretty Princess had managed to retrieve the box of Rice Krispies from the table and pour herself a heap into her lap and have a snack. I sighed but resigned myself to the next task at hand which would be krispy clean-up when I began to see her face start squirming. Her eyes were getting teary and she was scrunching up her nose a lot. It passed through my mind quickly what might be going on, but instead of giving my thought up….I inquired,

"What are you doing?"

She looked up at me, and quipped, "Um, cereal booger."

Just as I had suspected, she was shoving Rice Krispies up her nasal pasage. Lovely. My thoughts turned to stories I had heard of friends with kids who had manage to get play dough, bagels, and M&M’s up those delicate tunnels. And I quickly wondered if she had snaked them up far enough to get trapped in her sinus cavity.

I walked over to assess the damage while asking,

"Did you get them stuck in your nose?"

"Yeah….maybe"

Laying her down flat on the floor I took a peek. The little booger, pun most definitely intended, was clinging for life not so far up her nose. Would I need a tweezer? Would my finger be too big? What if I push it farther up? Ahhh what the heck. I held the other side of her nose down and told her to blow. Out flew the krispy and she exclaimed, "Booger!"

After we went over strict instructions on what things were allowed in our noses (answer: nothing) I sent her on her way and went to get the broom to sweep up the mess. Before I could make it back, she was snorting again. Sure enough another blow and four more rice krispies came flying out! I couldn’t believe it! What was going on with her? And how gross is that?

Ahh so needless to say, it was a long morning. Only beginning with cereal boogers and ending somewhere between two dirty diapers and a hurricane-like rainstorm while running late to the doctors. At least bedtime is not too far off, should I attempt a bath tonight?